Let Your No be No and Your Yes be Yes

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been caught breaking a ‘promise’. Whether it was intentional or not.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been caught breaking a ‘promise’.

Whether it was intentional or not.

I promised to bring my oldest niece to her gymnastics practice, but I forgot. I promised to meet my mother at the gym so we could both whip our bums into shape, but I got busy at work and had to cancel. I promised that I wouldn’t get ‘mad’ when my husband brought up his opinion about my dinner dish last night, but I did (oops). So many times in my life I can recall not only my yes not meaning a thing, but even my PROMISES not holding significant weight.

I know what God has to say about this. He says that we need to be so trustworthy, so careful to speak and so filled with integrity that our only words on decisive matter should be ‘Yes’ and ‘No’. While doing devotions the other day in the book of James, I read in chapter 5 verse 12, “Above all my brothers and sisters, do not swear- not by heaven nor earth or by anything else. All you need to say is simply “Yes” or “No”. Otherwise you will be condemned.” Huh. Condemned? Really? Wow. God just basically whipped out a huge LISTEN TO ME sign and hit me with it.

I decided to reflect a bit…

How many times a day do I say “Yes” to something but not really take the time to think on whether I mean it or not…

I’m so bad at this! I’m a “Yes” queen! Anyone else out there like me?

I’m so afraid of hurting peoples feelings, that I am inclined to say yes before people even get their last word out. Its not the healthiest of habits. “Yes, of course, I will do the dishes.” “Yes, I will be able to pick you up tomorrow.” “Yes, I will come to your birthday party tomorrow night after working a 12 hour day and have to be up the next day at the crack of dawn to sing at church for 5 hours.”

I just. cant. stop.

I guess what this devotion did was, it made me pause and take note. I don’t think saying yes all the time, or even most the time, is a good thing. But likewise, if I am saying ‘No’ all the time, but don’t ever give anyone a reason to believe that I mean it, then I might as well not say it at all. In fact, I’d say not meaning what you say in either case is a bad thing. Turns out, God agrees. 😉 Funny how He knows whats best, even ahead of my own accordance.

So in order for anyone to take me seriously, I need to actually mean what I say. I shouldn’t have to swear, promise or repeat my yes’ 50 times for someone to believe me! Or, even worse still, make all my promises and STILL have no one believe me. When I’ve reached that level of ‘loose mouth’, there is a definite problem.

Loose Mouth: A symptom of the heart. A face muscle that’s not yet developed with self control and wisdom. It hasn’t been trained to keep shut when its needed, but instead blurts out any and all thoughts. This undisciplined muscle has been known to end relationships, damage careers and bring even the toughest people down to their knees.

Words.

Yes or No.

Such little words but they hold so much power.

Maybe it’s just me, but I really needed this reminder. My word (and words) should be worth something.

I know it’s not easy. We probably wont even reach the point where we do this all the time. But if we could reach the point of doing it…75% of the time? I know it’d be worth it.

I have worked with children for a very long time. Whether they are 14 years old or 4, I know for a fact that they need my ‘Yes’ and ‘No’ to mean something. It’s what they base their actions and decisions on. It’s what they look to for a green light or a red. It’s how I, as the adult and authority, keep my sanity within discipline!

If my word means something, suddenly so do I.

God is so good! He knows the best for me (and you) before I figure it out. Today, I pray for realization, for a sensitive nature and an awareness of where I lack wisdom and discernment, so that I may speak with certainty, “Yes” or “No”.

Let’s continue speaking with power and truth ladies! ❤

  Matthew 5:37

“All you need to say is simply, “Yes” or “No”. Anything beyond this comes from the evil one.”

Better Safe Than Sorry

Accidents happen. But what do you do in the event of an emergency and how can you prevent disaster?

Yesterday, my littles and I were headed to the mall for a stroll since the weather was predicted to be quite cold and cloudy. Once we were inside, I let the older sister down to walk and run the vacant halls. She is very active and absolutely loves this free reign of the halls before the mall stores open. She was headed to a familiar phone case kiosk to take a look around. I greeted the kiosk attendant and exchanged a few pleasantries, all the while keeping an eye on my little one. She decided she had had enough of phone cases and wanted to move on. The problem was she didn’t look where she was going. When she turned around to head off down the left corridor, she bumped her noggin right on an eye level metal sign. Not a great feeling for her and not a great moment for me. I hate when she gets hurt. She hates when she gets hurt. Her little sister hates when she gets hurt (she cries when sissy cries-it’s the sweetest thing). So here she was bawling. I picked her up and immediately turned on nurse mode.

First I checked for blood-there was none. Next I looked to see where she made impact- it turned out it was on the bridge of her nose (awful). Once I identified where the injury was, as long as I knew it was not emergency status (blood, passing out etc), I gently felt around the area to see if there was extreme tenderness in any one area. She did not screaming when I pressed anywhere around the area so I knew she was fairly OK. She had stopped crying at this point but swelling had begun. We hustled to the nearest Starbucks and grabbed a cup full of ice, a few napkins and a white mocha latte. Applying the ice about every minute for 20 seconds or so the area did the trick and the swelling was down within 10 minutes.

Fast forward two hours and we were now at the park with our friends. The remaining cup of ice was still in the stroller. At this particular park, they have metal ducks lined in a row. It is a statue that gives recognition and sentiment to a duck pond that is in the park as well. The display shows 8 little ducklings following their Momma duck. They were solid metal and big enough for even a 3-year-old to climb onto comfortably. On this particular day, there were many other nannies and moms around watching their littles play in this area.

There was one little blonde, curly haired girl who must have been around 1 ½ years old. She was still a little wobbly on her feet but would walk faster at times and sometimes even run. Now the area surrounding the duck display was nice soft grass but the area right underneath was cobblestone. This little girl was headed to give one of the little ducks in the back of the line a hug when…I think you know where this is going…She tripped on a cobblestone block, fell forward and hit her forehead on the duck’s unforgiving body. This impact sent a resonating DONG through the air and everyone stopped. You could FEEL the impact. The girl didn’t move for what seemed like forever but I’m sure was no more than 5 seconds. The nanny or mom had seen what happened and was on her way over but she was sitting on the nearby bench, so it took a few seconds for her to scoop the little girl in her arms. Soon the girl began crying (thank goodness) and the adult began consoling her. She assured her she was OK and empathized with the pain the little girl must be feeling. When I thought to myself…

MY ICE! God is so good. Remembering that my little not even a couple hours earlier had had an unfortunate collide with a metal object as well, I reached for the left-over ice in our stroller. The woman took the ice with enthusiasm. My friend, having finished giving her little boy his sandwich had a plastic baggy. She offered it to the woman and we had completed an ‘ice pack’ for this little girl. Now up until this point, the girl had been facing the woman in her arms and I had not had the chance to see her forehead. What came next will be etched in my brain for a very long time…

I looked up to find this precious girl with a black and blue, goose egg size welt on her head. When I tell you that I got shivers from looking at it, I am not exaggerating. I was very concerned and waited to see what the woman would do once she took a good look at it. The woman with ice in hand began….texting. Yes, texting. To be fair though, I do not know and don’t claim to know whether the text was going out to a mother or father in hopes of getting their opinion on further action or the incident. However, I do know one thing, she could have applied the ice to this girls head!

This was the second worrying event. The first was noticing the girl did not move or get up once she made contact with the metal duck. Now the third worrying event was next. As the little girl sat in this woman’s lap, her welt growing, she was merely staring. She stared straight ahead. No more crying. She wasn’t looking around or fidgeting to get down. This worried me and I began to think this may be a concussion level head collision. I did say a little about the ice application and I’m sure my face told the tale of how awful this little girls head looked, but I didn’t say too much in fear of overstepping.

I know that this nanny or mother probably meant well. I overheard her say that the little girl did not like it. I’m sorry, if your little one is pretty seriously injured and you as the adult know what is best to remedy it, do it! Do not let the child squirming or resisting the treatment, null the treatment application all together. That is just ridiculous!

So, in recap…she did not apply ice, she did not call anyone, she did not seem too concerned and she let her little down to resume playing.

I am in no way aiming to bash this woman or paint her in a bad light. Perhaps she was not aware of the possible severity of the situation or maybe she knew something that I did not. I am however, using this pretty graphic story to highlight two things that I believe are so important when you are a mom, caregiver in anyway or nanny by trade.

On the Go First Aid Kits

Whenever you leave the house, it is a good idea to keep a simple first aid kit on hand. I have not always done this. Throughout the years of caring for children and seeing the seemingly impossible situations they get themselves into within 2.2 seconds, I have learned that it is so important to have this handy bag around. The kits should be small and filled with only the essentials: band aids, cleansing cloth, antibiotic ointment for cuts, gauze and tape, a breakable ice-pack and possibly Benadryl in case of severe allergic reactions. These items should hold you over, even in a slightly emergency situation, until you arrive at the doctors and your child begins receiving medical attention.

Better Safe than Sorry

It is always better to be safe than sorry. This is especially true when you are a nanny, teacher or caregiver that is watching someone else’s child, but also true for parents as well.  My oldest little earlier that fine day had hit her head off a sign. Sure, she didn’t bleed, she didn’t cry for more than 2 minutes, and the area was not severely tender to the touch but noticing the quick swelling and potential bruising, I still applied ice for quite awhile. I have learned and would like to tell you before you have to find out the hard way on your own…It is always better to be safe than sorry.  

Always.

I have gone ahead and attached a FREE FIRST AID KIT CHECKLIST for you to use as you wish. Personally, I place this check list above the hook in the entryway where the kit hangs nicely. I do a quick check of what I need, make a note of what we are running out of and grab it as we head out the door. I hope you find it useful as well!

Thank you for reading and sharing your time with me! 

If you found this post helpful or beneficial in any way, please SHARE with friends and fellow caregivers! I would also love to hear from you. Have you had this situation happen to you? Do you agree it is better to be safe than sorry? I want to hear from YOU!   

Talk soon,

-NannyBeth